Oh The Insanity Of It All!
by Elven Warrior1
Summary: It's Insane, it's hilarious, it's romantic, it's devistating. Most of all, it's exciting! What more does a Harry potter fic need? Please R
1. Default Chapter

Oh The Insanity Of It all! Written by: Elven Warrior1  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter. Never will either. So don't sue me! (cowers from the many frying pans) I just wanna play!  
  
A/n: I'm taking a different approach on this story...so let me know what you think of it! Please review!  
  
(Snape Manor)  
  
"Harry said."  
  
"I don't care what Harry said!" Severus snapped, pulling the girl to him, crushing their bodies together in a grinding fashion. "I don't fucking care what Potter has said about me. I am NOT dead and I will NOT forfit this marriage!" The man fumed, suddenly grabbing the girl closer to him yet. She gave a strangled whimper, her lungs feeling as if they were going to collapse without oxygen. She was becoming light-headed.  
  
"Sev..I..." She gasped, but was cut off by Severus's lips crashing down on her own in a very briusing kiss. She whimpered again, this time, in total agony.  
  
"Nobody is going to take you away from me." He growled into her ear, leaving the havoc on her lips to show. Severus shoved the girl away, stalking from the room in his rampage. She groaned, falling limply onto the couch, touching her lips and left wincing.  
  
It was true. Annaliese Morgana Shroyer had married Severus Snape under orders of Albus Dumbledore, leader of The Order Of The Phoenix. But it was these orders, not for love, but for the aid of the order. Instead of being comfortable in the marriage, she was constantly on her toes, afraid of what was going to come around the corner. Being a seer and able to sence everything helped, but she had become frightened beyond belife. Especially of her husband. Whom had just showed some of the rough love he had laid apon her fragile lips. Which were now turning black and blue from the kiss he gave.  
  
She was going to Marry Harry James Potter out of love, but the wedding had been crashed, and she was kidnapped. Taken hostage by Dumbledore himself, and then forced to marry the ex Deatheater. Everything was scaring her now. Anna sighed upon hearing her husband flee up the stairs to their room to get changed into more comfortable clothing.  
  
It wasn't that Severus wasn't a good man. He indeed was a very loyal and commiting man, truthfull and independent. He was pathetic in bed, and he loved fiercely when under stress. She had gotten to know both touches. His gentle, and his brutal. Lately, he had been in his brutal stage for weeks now. She stiffened as feet started to decend from the stairs. Severus was coming back down for his evening tea.  
  
Jumping up, Annaleise ran to the kitchen before he would get there, starting his tea quickly. Minutes after the water had begun to boil, he entered the room, daily prophet at hand, and smug expression on his face. It was unreadable. But Anna did not dare to try, nor did she want to speak, in fear of the havoc it would cause.  
  
He sat down at his usual place, opening the paper. A bit later, Anna layed a cup of hot tea and a plate of biskets at his right hand. Still, Anna did not say anything. Instead of trying to finnish the dinner dishes, she grabbed a cup of tea herself, before sitting herself across from her husband, keeping quiet still.  
  
Suddenly, Severus yelled, throwing his teacup, hitting Anna's chair, shattering into a million tiny pieces. Ignoring the glass now sticking into her neck and head, she stared at her husband, fear strcken. Severus continued his rampage of destroying the kitchen out of sudden fury, leaving his wife paralyzed with fear. He stopped for a minute, turning to her, seeing her covered in blood, starring at him with wide fearfull eyes. The look he had never seen from her.  
  
On instinct, he ran to her, examining her wounds before making a conclusion. She gasped as he touched her arm in an act of comfort. It took him aback. He stared at his wife, who now closed her eyes tight, turning her head away from him. He saw it then: supressed tears of fear, hurt and pain. Severus felt guilty and hated himself for doing this to the women he loved.  
  
"Anna." He whispered, placing a gentil hand on her shoulder. She took in a sharp intake of breath. "No, Anna, I'm not going to hurt you. I never meant to hurt you. Shh...Anna, look at me." Suddenly, Annaleise jumped up and ran. She couldn't run through the house. Severus would catch her all to quickly. Instead, she tore off to the gardens, hoping to loose him in the many orchards. Anna was fast, but Severus was just as fast. "No! Anna! Please! Stop! Anna!" He called, scared now beyond belife. He had just petrified his wife and she was now trying to run from him.  
  
Picking up his pace, he caught her as they entered the middle part of the apple orchard. She gave a horrible scared sob as she leaned forward, tears running down her face, body shaking. Severus turned her around, pulling her close, holding her tight, trying to sooth her.  
  
"Shhh. Anna, I'm so sorry." He whispered, tightening his arm around her waist. "I'm so so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, or to scare you. Baby, shhh. Please, stop crying, talk to me." Anna gave a horrible body-wracking sob before clutching to him, crying so hard that even his body was shaking. "Oh no, Anna. No no no..Shhhh..please don't cry. I didn't mean any of it. Oh baby...shhhh." By now, he had fixed her up completely, getting the glass out. But not cleaning up the blood, which was drying on her clothes and skin.  
  
They must have had stood there for a good hour or so, before Anna had calmed down enough to make it back to the house. Inside the kitchen, the house elves were cleaning up the mess that Severus had created. Leading Anna up to the bathroom to clean her up, and try to make her relax. He helped her strip out of her clothing, and filld their enormus bathtub full of hot water and rose bubbly bath. She sunk down into the water immediately, closing her eyes and leaning against the tub.  
  
She was starting to feel more at ease with the eveing, and then she felt something else enter the tub. She opened her eyes to find Severus coming towards her, naked and looking worried. Anna began to tense again, for no reason at all. An arm snaked around her waist, bringing her to him.  
  
"Anna." He said quietly, his voice husky. She leaned in slightly, acknowledging him. "I'm so sorry." She sighed, opening her eyes.  
  
"Sev."  
  
"No, Anna." He said, his voice still quiet. "I shouldn't' have lost my temper like that for a bloody newspaper article. It was not my place. I haven't been treating you like the woman I love for so long. I saw it in your eyes tonighte. Gods..Anna, I don't know what I can do to make it up. I love you so much." He whispered, tears flowing freely down his face now. Anna's breath caught in her throat, making her want to cry again. Instead of trying to comfort like that. She moved. Instead of just sitting next to him, Anna now straddled his hips, pressing her forehead agaist his and hugging him. Severus hugged back, letting his tears fall onto her breasts and into the water. "Gods Anna, I'm so sorry."  
  
"Shh." She shushed him. "No, just shhh. You're forgiven." Severus tightened his arms, bringing his face upwards slightly. He captured her lips into a soft, but passionate kiss. The first like this in months. It felt like their very first kiss, which sent wonderful shivers up through her entire body, lingering in certain places. On instinct, she pushed her body against his, kissing back with as much hunger and love filled passion as ever.  
  
Every now and then, they would pull apart to breath, only to continue their love filled kissing, before Severus moved them to the shower to rinse off. Which indeed they did, but quickly after all soap was gone, Severus plunged himself into Annaleise, making her gasp before falling into the quick rhythm. It had to be the first time of actually having sex without the brutality, but filled with desire and lust. Anna was now in a world full of pleasure, actually feeling wanted again. But sex was the only thing that made her feel wanted when in the presence of Severus Snape.  
  
It took much longer this time. Severus had to have been holding off for her, before giving a yell and then exploding inside of her. Anna clung to him, breathing hard, hands roaming over his back. Before she realized it, he had lifted her and carried her back to their bedroom, laying her down onto their bed, helping her slip on a satin-silk nightgown.  
  
The cloth was a pearly purple, falling over her slim form and laying against the floor all around her. She had gotten it from Harry Potter, who had fallen in love with her long before her betrothal to Severus Snape. In fact, Anna would come home from her secret job to find parcels sitting on her porch addressed to her from Harry. And each time, there would be a very lovely piece of lingerie, clothing, jewlery or flowers. Each time, Severus had thought she brought it home from the muggle market down the road. But it came from her secret admirer.  
  
Anna did not love Severus Snape. She could not love him. He had been to brutal and absuing to her too long, and tonighte was unexpected. Tomorrow morning, he would go right back to anger filled heart, back again to the brusing kisses and sex. She could not stand to go through it all again for another 5 months at a time. If he truly loved her, he wouldn't dare treat her like this. No, she had to call for help. Anna needed help and could not help herself. She sighed as she was lain into their queen sized bed.  
  
She layed awake for at least 5 hours, finally convinced that he had fallen asleep, she slipped out of bed. Severus turned over in his sleep, muttering something. She froze when she caught the word "Harry...Anna...kill." That was not good. Now he was thinking about killing someone in his sleep. Could he know about Harry? No no, that was impossible. She put up so many walls on her mind to block out everything about Harry. Only because it angered him, and meant trouble for her. Severus began waking up slighty. Panicking, she ran back ot the bed, slipping back in and turning on her side, closing her eyes.  
  
He sat up for a moment, scanning her, before laying back down. A moment later, he was snorring again. She gave a shaky sigh before deciding that she needed some sleep. Unconsiously, she slipped off into a nightmare filled sleep, waking up the very same morning at 11:30.. Groaning, she sat up, rubbing her tired eyes. Looking over at Severuss' side of the bed, she noticed a small note. Picking it up slightly, she read through it. Frowning the entire time.  
  
Anna,  
There are a list of things down on the breakfast table that I would like you to help the house elves with. We are having company tonighte that I failed to mention yesterday evening. The Order Of The Phoenix is coming for a rather large dinner. And I would appretiate the house to look it's absolute best. Behave yourself, no leaving the house unless you must buy something. And I will see to you near 9:30 tonighte.  
  
Severus  
  
Ps. If I find Potter in our home, or even near you, I will kill him.  
  
Anna gasped slightly. He didn't know about them, but he had a dream about him. Which included her. So he was just acting out of the dream, thinking it was a premonition or vision. She snorted. 'It's so like you.' She thought to herself, frowning even further.  
  
That left her the rest of the day to find someone to help her out of this marriage, and to get to someone who she knew loved her for all she was worth. Who did not dare hide anything from her. Something then hit her like a ton of bricks: His pensive.  
  
Turning sharply on her heel, she ran down to the dungeons of their home still in her nightgown, breathing quickly. Inside the room that she was forbidden to enter, she wished she had never come here. The room was laiden with chains, ropes, muggle hand cuffs, a very romatic heart shaped bed, a saddle, and many other sex-related items. Anna felt like she was going to be sick. Rushing to the closet, she threw it open, discovering many different whips, and there, his peinsive. Sticking her hand inside, she was pulled into his thoughts and memories.  
  
She gasped when she found herself standing in the middle of the very same room she was in, watching her husband fuck the living daylights out of Ginny Weasley. The redhead girl screamed and begged for him to stop, but this only urged him to go faster. Anna could tell that he was holding off as long as he could, just o torture her. She felt her breath being lost, as she stumboled towards them, her frown deepening as hatred began to boil. Severus Snap rapped Ginny just because he felt like it. Then suddenly, she was brought to another memory. Much like the first one, except this had Fred Weasley strapped to the saddle, with Severus raping him too. Anna felt completely sick now. He rapped anyone he could get his hands on. Men and women.  
  
But she was taken to another memory. This time, a small child of no more then 9 with red hair, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger-Weasley's daughter, and hers and Harry's goddaughter, Lanie looked crestfallen, haning from the wall. Glad in chains with cuffs at her feet and wrists. Severus had soon stalked in, naked, and instantly began rapping the girl. Anna now felt so dizzy, she forced herself to sit on the floor. Her husband, husband, was a compleat monster.  
  
Balancing her mind, Anna found herself back in the present, the very same room her husband, the man she was forced to marry, commited so many damn rape acts. She needed out of there now before somebody else found their way into his clutches. She ran. She ran for her life, for the lives of everyone else.  
  
Running to fireplace in the living room, she threw in some floo powder, calling for Harry's house. His head appeared in the fireplace, looking surprised.  
  
"Anna!" He said, studdying her face, instantly looking worried. "What's happened? Are you ok?" She shook her head, allowing a small sob to escape her throat. "Stand back Anna," Harry warned. "I'm coming over." She quickly stood up straight, moving far enough to let Harry through. The second he stepped through the hearth, he rushed to her, gathering her in his arms. She burried her head into his shoulder, sobbing effectively. "Anna, whats happened? Are you alright? Please, Anna, shhh."  
  
Regaining her composure, she wipped her eyes, taking a few calming deep breaths. Harry kept his hands on her arms, keeping a comforting hold on her, waiting for her to talk.  
  
"Oh Harry." She whispered. "He's a monster! A fucking-raping monster!" Harrys' concerened look deepened so much. "Come on, down in the dungeons. Follow me!" Grabbing his hand, she ran back down to the dungeons to the same room she ran from. Harry took one look, and looked disgusted. He saw Snapes' penisive sitting out on the table. On instinct, he plunged his hand into it. Minutes later, he came out looking angry beyond belife. He grabbed Anna to him, keeping her tightly close to him, but not to cause her discomfort. "Harry.."  
  
"I've seen enough." He stated, bringing her to look into her face. "He's hurt you..he's hurt you! Physically and emotionally hurt you! He rapped Fred, Ginny, Lanie, Bill, Charlie and Hermione! The newest memory he had put in there, that you didn't see...Fucking Mother of Merlin I am going to kill him!" Anna looked at him, her eyes widening slightly. Harry's eyes flashed with tremendous fury. "It was apparently a dream he put in there. You and I were on a picnic, just being friends, though we had kissed. Snape came up to you, wrenching you away, throwing you to the ground, knife in hand. Gods Anna...he killed you! Just to get you away from me! He killed you!" Anna froze.  
  
'Harry...Anna...Kill..' That's what he was talking about. To kill her to keep her away from Harry. She felt all the color drain from her face.  
  
"I'm surprised he didn't do it in his sleep. I'll never let him get near you again. Never.Never!" Harry cried, grabbing Anna into a tight hug. She hugged him back, just as tightly, wanting to leave. "I have to get you out of here. We have to get out of here now." He stated, looking around the room. Anna looked up at him. "Lets go get your clothes and items you brought with you to this house. Come on." Harry led Anna up to her and Severus's room, as if he had lived here himself. She just followed him, and rushed into her personal closet and retrived her traveling suitcases.  
  
She and Harry went to her dresser pulling out the cloths and placing them into the largest bag. Ontop of her clothes were her pictures of her friends (though they were mostly of Harry) and family. Soon, Harry came across the wedding picture of Anna and Snape. He growled in his throat, before throwing it at the wall, shattering the glass into a tiny million pieces. Anna placed her hand on his arm, pulling him back to what they were doing. He kissed her hand before placing several pairs of pants into the first largest bag.  
  
An hour of frantic packing went on, and Harry spelled the bags and trunks to fit into his pocket before the two headed down to the living room. Everything Anna owned that she brought with her carefully packed away. He stood back, allowing Anna to floo first.  
  
"The GreyStone!" She shouted, before dissppearing in a puff of green smoke. Opening her eyes, she found herself standing in Harry's beautiful family room. She stepped out of the fireplace, allowing him to floo in. Instantly after, Harry appeared. He watched Anna as she looked around the room, mystified. He grinned. 


	2. Chapter Two

Oh The Insanity Of It All! Written by: Elven Warrior1  
  
Disclaimer on the first chapter  
  
Chapter Two  
  
(Potter Mansion)  
  
"Pretty huh?" He asked, smiling fully as she turned around with a grin.  
  
"Absolutly stunning!" She breathed, taking in the sight before her. "So much better than Snape Hell-Whore." Harry laughed, wrapping an arm around her waist. She smiled running and, splaying her hands on his shoulders.  
  
"We can be together now." He said quietly, still smiling, his eyes looking a bit glassy. Anna smiled, not carring how stupid she looked. His green gems of eyes sparked with love, Anna felt lost compleately. But she loved every minute of it. "I love you." He was still smiling.  
  
"I love you too, Harry." She said, before letting him bring her into a kiss that was indeed filled with love, passion, and a tinge of lust. She moaned subconsiously into his mouth, before arching her back, bringing them closer. The time had seemed to have flown by, before Harry looked at his wrist watch.  
  
"Quarter to two" He muttered, sighing as he rested his head against Annas', feeling too much at peace. "I guess maybe we should eat a small lunch." Anna chuckled, making him smile. Taking her hand, he led her to the dining room, sitting her down at the chair next to his.  
  
"Do you ever get lonely living alone?" Anna asked, as he took his seat. He only breathed for a bit, before answering. Apparently in deep thought.  
  
"I used too." He said sincerely. "But I don't think I will anymore." He gave a dazzling smile, making Anna melt. Just like she did everytime he smiled at her like that. "Ah! Merryl!" Harry cried, clapping his hands together at the sight of one of his house elves. "Could you make something of a light lunch for Anna and I. We're hungry." The house elf just grinned, bowing and dissappearing into the kitchen.  
  
"What does Mione' think of the house elves you've got here? I assume you have more then one?" Harry just laughed, running a hand through his wrily black hair. "Probally not the best then, I should think."  
  
"Hermione trys to free my house elves everytime she comes over. But she dosent' get the fact that they are already free. Whenever I'd get a new house elf, I freed them. Though each time I do, they wish to continue to work for me, for little pay. So I pay them each week." He gave a triumphent grin. "Besides, I have nothing better to do with my money anyway." He looked Anna over before his grin turning into a playfull smirk.  
  
"Hmm..I see you are wearing the nightgown I gave you last week." He mused. Annaleise looked down, shaking her head. "I thought that it would look absolutly stunning on you, though thinking I'd never get to see you wear it." His grin had gotten more eviler by the second. Anna just smirked herself. "And let me say, you look more stunning in it then you did when I pictured you in it the first time. Gorgeous. Absolutly stunning." Anna felt her cheeks get hot and grow red. Harry just skooted his chair closer. "Stand up." He said. She did so. He bit his lip. "Turn around once, please." He asked. She did so.  
  
"After lunch." He began, blushing a bit himself. "Can we go have sex?" Anna started laughing, the childish look on his face just made him so irresistably cute. He stood up, coming in front of her again. This time, his voice much lower, much more huskier. "Like we did before you were forced to marry that bastard?" Anna bit her lip, watching the man she loved in front of her. His hands found their way to her waist, pulling her a little closer. "Please?"  
  
Anna smirked evily now, her hands tracing a pattern over his chest, she licked her lips. "I think we could spare 10 minutes or so.." She looked up at Harry, his face getting closer.  
  
"I don't think I can't wait then." He muttered, kissing her neck, tracing the same pattern as she did on his chest, except using his tongue. Anna groaned. He had found the spot he marked a year ago. He slid a hand into his robes, retriving his wand. "Lovlus". Tapping the spot on her collar bone made the same exact pattern appear. A gold rose outlined in red. His and Anna's symbal.  
  
Anna smiled, pulling back the collar of his shirt and robes to look at his collar bone, and there exactly as they had gotten it, was the same rose. A precious symbal of their love, something that was going to last forever. Just then, the food appeared on the table. Eating hurridly, the couple then hurried upstairs to Harry's bedroom, which had now become theirs. Harry picked up Anna, throwing her playfully onto the bed, pouncing on top of her.  
  
"Oh you animal!" Anna cried out, leaning up to kiss him. Harry somehow had gotten out of his robes and shirt by now, leaving him barechested, wrestling with his pants. He was a man of mystery, how he had gotten his socks and shoes of was incredible, but she decided not to ask. The next thing she felt was her nightgown sliding off her body. Within seconds she was naked beneath Harry, who was carressing her, making her moan and twitch. "Harry, please...don't make me wait." She whispered, arching her back.  
  
"Gladly." He countered, kissing her before sliding into her, making her gasp loudly, clutching extreemly tightly to him. Instantly, he had her whispereing his name over and over, begging him to take her whole, to go faster, deeper. And each time, he complied. 15 Minutes, a record breaking ammount of time for love making, Harry let out a loud yell the same exact time that Anna did, both exploding like fire. Harry fell on top of Anna, breathing quickly, but smiling none-the-less.  
  
She wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him to her chest, allowing him to lick and tease her breasts. "Gods Harry." She murmered. "That was..incredible." She whispered hands roaming over his back, moaning once again.  
  
"Yes." He said breathlessly, still playing with her breasts. "You were incredible. You were the first time, you still are. You always will be. Gods, you don't know how much I love you." Anna tightened her grip, urging him to come closer to her face.  
  
"I love you with everything that I am, and more, Harry." She said, slipping her tongue between his teeth, making him moan this time. They fell asleep like that, and awoke 4 hours later. 


	3. Snapes' Got Issues

Oh The Insanity Of It All! Written by: Elven Warrior1  
  
Chapter three: Snapes' got issues  
  
(Snape Manor)  
  
"You've got to be kidding me!" Severus Snape snapped at the Minister Of Magic, whom stood before him with many aurors. "This is bloody insane! You have no evidence that I did any of this! Nothing at all!" Fudge calmly sighed, pulling out the recent divorce document. Severus took it,read it, and looked up with shocked eyes. "What?" He stated stupidly. "When? Why?!"  
  
"Miss. –"  
  
"Mrs. Snape." Severus snapped, attempting to rip the document.  
  
"Miss. Shroyer came into the Ministry early this afternoon with evidence of the rape crimes you have commited. Soon after, she filed the divorce. Younge Mr. Harry Potter was with her, a lovely couple they make. You can see the love in their eyes everytime they look at eachother. Don't you think? Did you ever look at Annaleise the way Harry looks at her?" Severus just stood there, shocked, and suddenly angry.  
  
"She can't file for a divorce when we've been bonded!" He yelled, throwing the nearest object he could find at the Minister. "And she cannot file for divorce when the other partner does not want it! So therefore, it can't be- "  
  
"There was no bond Mr. Snape." Kingsley Shaklebot said, placing the items that Severus threw on the table next to him. "Annaliese did not love you, so the bond that was supposidly created wasn't done. The other partner must love the other before you can call it a bond. Miss, Annaleise Shroyer had no love for you, for she was forced into your marriage, kidnapped from a wedding she was taking part in, one marriage to a Mr. Harry Potter. You're being arrested, Severus Salazarr Snape, for several accounts of rape and the battery of your former wife. This adds up to 19 years in Azkaban, then poroll with guards with you at all times. Terribly sorry"  
  
With that, The aurors placed a body bind on Severus Snape, carrying his stiff form away from the Snape Mannor, and apparating to Azkaban prision. 


	4. Oh Weasleys' And Weddings

Oh The Insanity Of It All! Written by: Elven Warrior1  
  
Chapter Four: Of Weasley's and Weddings!  
  
(Potter Mansion)  
  
4 Months Later  
  
"Anna!" Harry called up the stairs to his fiance. "Anna! Come on! The Weasleys are here! Hurry it up woman!"  
  
"Oh you shush! You spend more time in front of the mirror than I do, you Pansy!" She cried from her station in the bathroom of their master bedroom.  
  
"Hey! I resent that! And be nice, Pansy and Draco are coming over too! Now get your arse down here!" Harry called once again, turning back to his group of guests. Many hugs followed suit, as well as kissing and a wedgie from the twins. "Oi...I shouldn't have taught you that should I?" The twins just smirked.  
  
"Nope." George said.  
  
"Can't say that it was a smart move Harry ol' pal." Fred finnished, giving his twin a triumpent smirk. He stopped instantly when Anna decended the stairs, wearing a light purple skirt and white tanktop with a purple scarf wrapped around her neck. "Wow! Harry, can I have a go with her?!" Fred asked, shaking Harry's hand.  
  
"I think not, Fred." Anna replied, instantly being pelted with hugs and kisses from the Weasleys'. "Lanie! Oh sweetie! You look absolutly wonderfull!" Anna cried, picking up the 9 year old girl instantly.  
  
"Auntie Anna!" The girl had cried, wrapping her arms around her godmothers neck. "I missed you!" Harry clapped his hands.  
  
"Ok then, now that we've got all the hugs and kisses out of the way, can my Anna and I lead you to the Living room for tea and cupcakes?" Harry grabbed her elbow, leading her, Lanie and the rest of the Weasleys into the large Living room, whom took seats on the 4 couches .  
  
They talked, ate, drank, laughed and gossiped. Like every normal meeting between them. Soon enough, Draco Malfoy and his wife Pansy flooed in with daughter Michelle just as Harry had stated "Fred, hands off my fiance!" Instantly, the room went quiet, watching both Anna and Harry.  
  
"Finally popped the question again, Harry?" Draco smirked, leading his wife and daughter over to the couches. Instantly, Pansy began a conversation with Anna, looking excited. "Good lad!" Draco clapped his shoulder. "You two deserve eachother." Harry nodded, clapping him back on the shoulder.  
  
"But," Hermione stuttered. "She's married to S-"  
  
"Not anymore." Anna answered, abandoning the conversation with Pansy immediately. "He's been charged on the account of rape of several people in this room, and was very abusive with me. I did not love him, for I love Harry. In fact, Snape is locked up in Azkaban for 19 years." She said, holding Lanie closer to her. Several of the people looked apprehensive, and relaxed apon hearing his sentence for crime.  
  
"Who did he rape?" Molly Weasley asked, leaning forward.  
  
"Lanie, Hermione, Fred, Bill, Charlie and Ginny." Harry answered, wrapping an arm around Anna and Lanie. "Lanie was the most recent one. He threatened her life, as he did to everybody else, that if they told, he would come back for them. It's enough to make any of them quiet. Even full grown men." Several people went frantic.  
  
Hermione took Lanie back, hugging the girl tightly to her, with Ron hugging them, clearly upset. Pansy and Draco looked around sympathetically.  
  
"On Happier buisness!" Draco said, clapping his hands together this time. " Harry and Anna are getting married for good this time, and I think we should start on invitations, colors, flowers, place where the marriage is going to take place, and everything." He stated, ignoring the strange looks from Ron. "Hey, when you're wife is into weddings as she is, you start getting into it too. Besides, I wanted to see them be married before Anna was kidnapped. We all did! Now, any date for the marriage?" Anna grinned.  
  
"We want to do it on April 16th, next year. Seeing how it's November rigt now. It would give us plenty of time to organize and get prepared. Fudge is planning on April 16th to Marry us, so I guess that's what's going to happen." Pansy cooed.  
  
"The perfect time to get married, late spring early summer. Always a gorgeous time. Remember when Draco and I married on the first of May? It was so beautiful. It'll be perfect for your wedding, that's for sure. We're you planning on outside or inside?"  
  
"Outside." Anna said, taking Harry's hand into her own. "In a garden, preferably a large flower garden." She sighed slightly, leaning her head back against the couch, tired.  
  
"That would be a gorgeous way to get married." Hermione said, sending a glance at Ron, who blushed slightly. For a grown man, he sure did not lose the blushing. When do you plan on going out to find bridesmaid dresses and your wedding robes?"  
  
"Robes?" Anna repeated, lifting her head up. "I'm not wearing robes." She shook her head. "I'm wearing a traditional muggle wedding dress, the bridesmaids will wear traditional dresses that I pick, and Harry will wear dress robes. But they'll be different then what the usual dress robes are."  
  
Ron snorted rather loudly, covering his mouth and nose apon the sudden looks everyone was giving him.  
  
"Ah." Annaleise said, a smirk on her face. "Maybe we should make the men wear maroon robes? What do you think, Harry Love?" Ron choked. 


	5. Snape REALLY has issues

Oh The Insanity Of It All! Written by: Elven Warrior1  
  
Chapter Five: Snape REALLY has issues...  
  
(In Azkaban, Cell 56410, Criminal S. Snape.)  
  
A weak looking man huddled into the corner of the stone cell he was confined too. His skin sickly pale yellow, his teeth growing yellow and black. He looked malnurished, disturbed and haunted. The black eyes that lost their manipulation the moment he was locked into this room.  
  
All this because of his ex-wife.  
  
She had to stumbol upon his pensive that he kept hidden in the forbidden dungeon room. That wretched woman had to go down there and do this to him. Though it was partially his fault, thinking he could trust her loyalties.  
  
So she loved Potter. Potter of all people. An arrogant, obnoxious bastard that he was, mirror image of his father. Ok sure, maybe she was forced into this marrige between himself and her, but he loved her.Anna never said that she loved him.  
  
Wait...she never said that she loved him. The mans head snapped up, eyes suddenly wide realization. What Kingsley said. That the bond wouldn't be created unless both partners shared love.  
  
Damn. And he had been so blind and not had seen it. Looking back on it now, it was so obvious. The kisses were so heartless, the sex was nothing. What was that fraze she kept saying while having sex? Potier de Harry...Potier de Harry...Harry Potter.  
  
So Harry had been on her mind. That or trying to block the image of him out. The thought of her and Harry reproducing was horrendous. He wouldn't have it. Yet, he never had any children of his own. Wait, he and Anna did not reproduce. She must have used a birth control charm on herself, to avoid having his children.  
  
Clever little bitch. 


	6. Of Marriage Talk

Oh The Insanity Of It All! Written by: Elven Warrior1  
  
Chapter Six: Of Marriage Talk  
  
(Bill Weasleys' Home) 4 more months later  
  
"Bill, I don't mean to sound like I'm trying to pry or anything, but what is it like to be a married man?" Harry asked, outlining the rim of his coffee mug with his index finger. "I came so close to it last time, but it was ripped away from me. So I have no idea what it's like." The red haired man gave a laugh, before drinking from his own mug, thinking quietly.  
  
"Different at first." He admitted. "It's a bit strange to wake up next to the person you're bonded and married to for the rest of your life. It'll be a bit stressfull at times, but very worth it." He gave a smile, thinking of his own wife and family. "When you have kids, you'll feel totally completed. Fleur and I were thrilled when we had Corinne. "Bills' face was skrewed up slightly "Harry, did you and Annaleise have sex, before you proposed again?" Harrys' cheeks grew red instantly.  
  
"She and I slept together before she was married to Snape." He admitted, face still vibrant red. "Aaaand..we slept together once I brought her back to my place. So that's twice." The color in his cheeks died down quite a bit at the grin of the other man in front of him. "What's so funny?"  
  
"Thank god you slept with her before Snape did." Bill agreed, face distorting as if tasting something rather nasty. "I wouldn't want that if I were her." The red head paused, then eyes giving a sudden spark. "What's she like in bed?"  
  
Harry choked on his coffee, spitting it out all over the table, sputtering something mad. The red head just watched, very amused, leaning forward.  
  
"Are you mad?!" Harry coughed. 


	7. Of Tripletts, Weddings, and Babbies!

Oh The Insanity Of It All! Written By: Elven Warrior1  
  
A/N: I'm really having fun with this! Hopefully you're enjoying it as well! Please review!!  
  
Chapter Seven:Of Triplettes, Weddings and Babbies!  
  
(The Lenson: Home of Ron and Hermione Weasley)  
  
It was rather crowded in the home of Ron and Hermiones', but Anna didn't care. She enjoyed every minute of it, all the little children the play with. Something interesting lay hidden around every corner. It was a truly remarkable house. Though an explosion could be heard every now and then from somewhere within in 4 stories.  
  
A particular loud bang made Ron Weasley jump up, making sure the youngest were still in their play pin. "The triplettes. They're worse than Fred and George were!" He exclaimed, throwing himself back into his chair that he had jumped from. "Sometimes I wonder if they write to Fred and George asking for tricks to play. They've deffinitly gotten ideas from them. Why else would they be brewing Merlin knows what up in that room of theirs?" Hermione patted his hand sympathetically.  
  
"Our eldest children and they're triplettes. It devistated Ron terribly when he found out." She gave a grin "Apparenly his talking to the embryo didn't work." Anna mentally snorted. Her sister Caraleen would have to be told about that.  
  
"I don't think the triplettes are so bad." Annaliese said thoughtfully as another explosison errupted. "It gets you prepared for whatever you have next." Hermione nodded her agreement, shooting a death glare at Ron, who put up his hands in defeat.  
  
"So Annaleise, have you and Harry talked about children yet?" Ron asked, pouring himself and the two women a cup of tea. "I mean, you're going to get married in 1 month now, any thoughts of kids?" He handed her the cup, which she accepted.  
  
Delaying her answer, Annaleise nursed her tea for a moment, remembering what Harry had said. Setting her cup down, but hands still cuddling it, she gave a grin. "Actually, we have." She confessed. "And we've both agreed, that we want a large family. Larger then your family, even I think." Ron pulled a face, making both women grin.  
  
"More then seven kids?" Ron repeated. "Has he gone mad?!" Anna chuckled.  
  
"No, he's quite sane." She said, taking another sip of tea. "He's determined to keep the Potter line moving. Considering he is the last one of the Potters bloodline. I can understand where he's coming from." She paused, a second. "Though, he isn't the one carrying them and pushing them out between his legs." She watched Rons' face go pink, his freckles sticking out more. Hermione had to cover her mouth to stiffle her laughter. "I won't tell you how many children he wants, since you'll think he's gone mad then. Though, I'll have to talk to him about it. When the third or so comes along"  
  
Hermione contorted her face whilst in deep thought. She looked up suddenly when a voice entered her head. Anna was looking at her out of the corner of her eye, so's not to distract anyones attention. '14 children is how many he wants..That'll be bloody terrifying!' It was Anna, using her telepathy. Hermiones' widdened as she gaped at her friend.  
  
"Good god!" Hermione suddenly cried out, causing Ron to jump. The raven- haired woman wore an amused expression, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"What? What!" Ron sputtered, looking around the room. "What happened?"  
  
"Nothing Ron, something just dawned on me, that's all." His wife reassured him, patting his arm gently. For a moment, Hermione just studdied Anna, her eyes widdening once again. "Anna, are you..pregnate?" The Raven-haired woman looked up from her cup, smirking. Ron spit out his tea all over the table and began sputtering once again, mouth open and gaping at her.  
  
"How do you get that?!" He asked Hermione, shaking his head. He looked back at Anna, studdying her closely. "You are pregnate. She's got that glow to her that women get. Merlins' Beard! Does Harry know?" Anna nodded.  
  
"Told him this morning, after I ran to the bathroom with morning sickness. I expect I'm about 4 months along now. Though it's obvious that I'm showing, not terribly though. He noticed this morning that my stomach was a little larger. Plus, I had taken a pregnancy test too, after morning sickness, and it came back positive." Anna beamed, a hand straying to her stomach, just resting. "Thank god the wedding is in a month, so I won't be showing terribly much." She gave another grin.  
  
"My my." Hermione said, coming to sit next to Annaleise, placing her hand next to hers on her stomach. "Oh Ron! The baby just kicked!" Ron instantly jumped up, placing his hand under Anna's.  
  
"Goodness." He smiled. "It's going to be a beautiful baby, that's for sure. I can't wait till it's born. I'm godfather right?" Hermione moved her hand a bit, to see if the baby would kick again.  
  
"I do think Harry intends on making you two the babys' godparents." Anna said thoughtfull, moving her hand so her friends could try and feel for the baby. "Qualité d'Oh!"  
  
"What is it?" Ron asked, looking slightly worried. Anna waved a dismissing hand  
  
"Oh nothing. Extreemly hard kick from the baby. Tiz be all." She gave a little grunt as the baby kicked again. Annaleise stood up, giving Hermione and Ron a hug. "Thank you for having me over. But I think its time to floo to Bills', retrive Harry and go home. I could use a shoulder rub." Grinning, Ron led her to the fireplace, helping her in. "That's not necessary." She laughed, smacking Ron. "I'm not helpless you know!"  
  
"Actually, I don't think you should be using the floo network."Hermione insisted, pulling her out of the hearth. Ron helping her.  
  
"Oh come no, I flooed over here!" Anna protested, struggling to get out of their grip. Ron's was much stronger, and he held her in place. "Oh come on Ron! Let me go!"  
  
"No, we'll drive you over to Bill's. No harm, no worries! Hermione, could you get my keys?" Hermione dissappeared and came back with a set of keys for a vehicle of some sorts. Hermione rounded up her children, and lead them out to the large van, Ron and Anna following behind.  
  
"Oh come now! I'm a grown woman! I can walk by myself!" Anna cried, still struggling. Ron grunted, pulling her hands from the door frame. "Ronald Artherious Weasley! Let me go this instant!" Ron shook his head.  
  
"No, Anna." Ron said. "You'll run away."  
  
"So!!" Anna snapped at him, grabbing for the doorframe once again. 


	8. Fourtneen Children and Coffee caffiennee...

Oh The Insanity Of It All! Written by: Elven Warrior1  
  
Chapter Eight: Fourteen Children and Coffee (caffienneeeeeeeeee)  
  
(Bill's House, an hour later)  
  
Harry and Bill were stil talking when the door bell rang, and Ron's voice entered their ears, along with the many chatters of Ron and Hermiones' children. Bill stood up, giving Hermione a kiss and Ron a hug, before hugging each of the children. Harry smiled when Ron pulled Annaleise into the room, looking rather grumpy.  
  
"Uh oh." Harry stated, watching his fiance. Bill looked at him oddly. "Ron wouldn't let her floo." Harry winced as Anna nodded sharply, taking a seat next to him. Bill winced too.  
  
"Smart move." Bill grinned however. "Never mess with a pregnate woman."  
  
"You know too?" Ron asked. Bill nodded.  
  
"Harry just told me about 15 minutes ago, actually." Bill gave Anna a smile, before giving her a hug too. Instantly, she lightened up, taking Harry's coffee away from him.  
  
"Hey now!" Harry said reaching for it. Anna shook her head.  
  
"No." She said into the mug. "Need coffee."  
  
Harry sighed, letting her finnish of his coffee, only to be handed another one from Bill, whom also gave Anna a new mug, for when she finnished off Harrys'. She gave a happy smile before indulging herself, ignoring everyone else in the room. Harry shook his head, earning a sympathetic look from Ron and Bill.  
  
"Any idea of what it might be?" Bill asked. Harry just shook his head, sending Anna a aprehensive look. "Names?"  
  
"If it's a boy, his name will be Dante. If it's a girl, we're going with Faith." He gave a grin, wondering if Anna told them about how many kids they were planning on having. "This will be just one out of 14 kids, you know." Bill grinned, clapping him on the shoulder. However, Ron choked on his own coffee, spitting out all over the plaec, just like he did with his tea.  
  
"FOURTEEN KIDS!" He bellowed, starring at Harry frantically. "YOU'VE BLOODY GONE MAD!" Everyone in the room began chuckling, covering their mouths to hide it. Harry looked amused, and Ron downright bewildered. "Jesus Christ Harry!" He breathed. "Do you know how hard that's going to be? 14 kids, 14 bloody kids?! I know you want to keep the Potters' going and all, but don't you think 14 is over doing it? Even just a little bit?" Harry let out a chuckle, quickly covering it up by taking a gulp of coffee, only to choke on it.  
  
"Ronald!" Hermione hissed, giving him a warning look. Ron gave her a challenging look right back.  
  
"Ron, vous vous rendez le regard plutôt féminin comme. Je vous suggère silencieux vous-même." Anna said, grinning. (A/N: translation: Ron, you are making yourself look rather feminine like. I suggest you quiet yourself.) Harry gave a horrid snort before falling into belly shaking laughter. Anna just rolled her eyes, starting on her second cup of coffee.  
  
"Fine, fine." Ron surrendered, deciding not to battle with three people that spoke french. "I still think fourteen kids is going a little over the top. But," He sighed. "whatever makes you happy, mate, then I'm happy. As long as I'm made godfather to at least two of them, then ok." Harry gave a grin, thumping Ron on the back. Harry looked over at Anna, who was still working on her coffee. He gave a quiet sigh, before reaching over and taking the cup away.  
  
"Hey now!" She said, reaching for it again. "I'm no done with that!"  
  
"I know, but you're not supposed to drink too much caffiene. Even if you're craving it love. Please, lets' not make this baby a hyperactive one. You already give me a run for my life." Annaliesess' face broke out into a wide grin. She gave a look at Ron before turning back to Harry.  
  
"So??" She said, raising an eyebrow. 


	9. Of Bridesmaid Dresses and Glass Doors

Oh The Insanity Of It All! Written by: Elven Warrior1  
  
A/N: yes! Chapter nine! PLEASE REVIEW! I'll love you forever! (puppy dog eyes and lip)  
  
Chapter Nine: Of Bridesmaid Dresses and Glass Doors  
  
"ABSOLUTLY NOT!" Anna roared, her arms flailing madly around her body, a frantic look on her face matched with disgust and what seemed to be sickness. "No no no no no no NO! I will NOT have my bridesmaids wearing-" she pointed at the dress before her. "that Monster!" Harry groaned, scrubbing his face with his hands as he sat in the chair. "Mom, no. My bridesmaids are not wearing that. And no, Harry is NOT wearing a kilt. That's final." Anna sat thinking for a bit, her eyes sparked with sudden know-it-all-ness. "What makes you think we're getting married in SCOTTLAND?!" Harry snorted from his hand shield.  
  
"Sweetums." Anna cringed upon hearing the old nickname she was given years ago. Harry suddenly popped out from his hands, a gleefull look on his face. "It's a beautiful place. Get married on the rolling hills." Anna shook her head. "Why not dear? It's a lovely place. Perfect for getting married. Anna shook her head again.  
  
"Mom, no." She stated strongly, crossing her arms over her chest, looking dangerous. But this didn't disturb her mother one bit. "Harry and I want to get married in a large garden. A garden here in London. Remember? I'm the goddaughter of Queen Elizabeth (A/N All Queens are named Elizabeth right? If not, she is in my story!) I asked her if it was possible to have my wedding performed in her courtyard, on the west wing of the castle." She turned to Harry, giving him a warning look. He still held that glint in his eyes at the mention of 'sweetums'. "Nana said that she would be more then happy to have our Wedding there. She wants to meet Harry as well. Harry straightened up at this.  
  
"The Queen wants to me?" He asked, pointing a finger at his chest. Anna nodded. "Why?"  
  
"Because I'm her goddaughter." Anna answered, as if talking to a three year old. Wait a minute, Harry tended to act like a three year old most of the time. Nevermind that. "One of Nana's daughters married a man by the name of Johnathan E. Shroyer. Thus procreating my dad Randal." Harry gave her a confused look. "Not a very long family line I know. Shroyer isn't a popular name. Especially back in the muggle Midevil days. Nope not nice at all." Anna sighed as her mother picked out a hot pink dress with yellow pinstrips down the front and polka dots on the back. "NO no no no no! Mother! Your taste in cloths is fine for a crazy punk like me yes I know. But this is a friggen WEDDING AT NANA'S!" Harry covered his face again, mumbling under his breath. "NO MA!" Anna cried as she spotted a bright lime green dress.  
  
"Erm. Anna?" Charlie Weasley said timidly, watching her mother with carefull eyes. Anna turned, ready to murder the dresses. He beckoned her over with his finger. "What about these?" He held up a light pink dress that the straps went around the arms, instead of over the shoulders, with a silvery top layer. It sparkled in everywhich way you turned in it. "You like?" Anna looked up at him with wide eyes.  
  
"'I like?' She repeated, making him look a bit uncertian. "I LOVE!" She cried, taking the dress from him to show Harry. "These are absolutly gorgeous! Harry don't you thin- MOTHER NO!" Anna screeched, racing over to the rack that her elder dissappeared behind. Charlie was laughing, picking up the rest of the dresses of the same kind.  
  
"Mental notes?" Charlie asked Harry as he took the seat next to him. Harry nodded, whimpering.  
  
"Never take Anna and her mother shopping for dresses. Completely utterly insane disastor."  
  
"TOO RIGHT IT IS!" Anna yelled over the racks. "MA! Come on! Stop it! I picked out the dresses, and that's final! You may be my mother and I love you dearly, but this is MY wedding. Now put those dresses down so we can get the girls fitted. Come on. NOW Ma!" Harry grinned, sinking lower into his chair. Charlie just shook his head. Anna had succesffuly seated her mother down before calling in her bridesmaids in for their fitting.  
  
After an hour, every woman was fitted. Even the flower girl, and Anna. But no one else could watch her get fitted. Harry tried too, but Charlie restrained him, roping him to his chair with a special charm. Just for fun, Hermione gagged him too. Anna giggled as the seamstress made adjustments here and there. And Voila! Anna was able to see herself in the dress she chose.  
  
Her mouth hung open as she did several turns. The dress was pure white, even though her mother argued with her about the tradition. It was a traditional muggle wedding dress, that poofed out slightly at the bottom. Pure white, with gorgeous beading around the boddice and arm gloves. It was a strapped dress, but the straps went around the shoulders, instead of overtop them.  
  
"Harry's going to have a fit with this." She thought out loud. Apparenly, Harry had heard, and was making odd noises. "No Harry, you can't see." Anna rolled her eyes, taking off the gloves. She bagged the dress up after getting back into her men jeans and tight t-shirt. She put her jewlery back on and carefully walked back to her friends, mother and fiance where waiting at. Harry had gotten himself out of his binds.  
  
"Why can't I see you in your dress untill the wedding?" He whined, tugging at the ropes on his feet. Hermione had to reach down and yank them free for him. 'Thanks." He snapped, throwing out his bottom lip, wiggling it dramatically.  
  
"Bad Karma" Anna answer, handing the woman several muggle bills. "So you have to wait. Besides, everyone will be wanting to see your face when you get a first glimpse at me. Keep your shirt on Harry, it'll only be a month." She studdied him for a bit. "And the dress will be in my room at Nana's..So you can't get into it." Harry's face suddenly fell. "Ha, yes, it's going to Nana's for safe keeping." She stated lastly, to make sure her voice was heard. Harry nodded, sighing in defeat.  
  
"Whatever you say love." He murmered, standing up ready to go. "Can we leave now? I wanna go home." Anna nodded, taking hold of her dress tighter, in case Harry tried to pull some trick.  
  
"Ok, lets go home. I'm tired and I could use a good cup of COFFEE!" She grinned, making Harry jump.  
  
"No no, no more coffee!" He cried, grabbing her arm. "If you drink anymore, I fear for the baby!" Harry pulled Anna back, forcing her to look at him. "Anna, " She scrunched up her face in annoyance, watching her fiance.  
  
"The baby is going to be fine Harry." Anna stated, rubbing her growing belly. "You've forgotten, I'm a true seer. I know the baby is fine." She gave a wink, before walking away, leaving a dumbfounded Harry behind. Minutes later, he came back to his sences, racing after Anna.  
  
"Anna!" He yelled, looking around frantically, spotting her at a Starbucks coffee shop. "Are you telling me you're reading the baby's thoughts?!?!?! ANNA!" Harry attempts were good hearted. But everyone in the coffee shop broke out into hysterical laughter as Harry failed to see the door was made completely out of glass before ramming into it. Sending himself across the sidewalk and into the curb of the street.  
  
Gaining her composure, Anna carefully opened the door with Harry';s face prints all over it and did her best to supress her laughter. Failing miserably.  
  
"Harry, the doors made of glass love." She snorted, covering her mouth. "You know, see through stuff?" Harry groaned. "Harry you dumb fuck." 


End file.
